My ex was a real bitch;
Not like Marilyn, in the Seven Year Itch.
Spends all of my money, and asks for more;
Wish they had a job, and weren’t so poor.
Plays games, and has no drive;
I have to feed them, to keep them alive.
An ex is an ex, for a reason.
Sometimes, it’s as bad as treason.
They piss you off, and make you mad;
When they finally leave, you are so glad.
Doesn’t help, with the laundry or dishes;
Going it alone, is in all of my wishes.
How did I pick them?, God only knows;
Being with them, it really blows.
If I married, she’ll take half of my things;
Small price to pay, to do without her stings.
I did love them, at one time.
Now I wish them ill, covered in lime.
Everything they do, gets on your last nerve;
Even when they drive, they can’t help but swerve.
When they eat, it makes your skin crawl;
Before you speak, finish chewing all.
Sometimes they smell, and don’t take a shower;
Wow, that underarm has some power.
I’m through, I’m through, I’ve had my fill;
When I have to pay, for their phone bill.
I can’t take anymore;
There’s the door!
Grab your stuff and go, I never want to see you again;
Spending time with you, would be worse than sin.
I can’t say enough, I’m done with my ex;
We’re meeting next week, but just for sex.