Had a first date, the other night;
It was a blind date, and she was a fright.
Had on goth makeup, and dressed all in black;
At the restaurant, I requested the back.
All she talked about, was death and the macabre;
Afraid my wallet, she would rob.
Went the worst, couldn’t get started;
When walking out, she slipped and farted.
She drank too much at dinner;
She thinks it makes her thinner.
While driving the car;
She let her hands go too far.
I had to stop her, so my friends don’t see;
Saw us together, would be the end of me.
Went to a movie, saw a horror flick;
Heard someone say, “Ew, what an ugly chick”.
Hung my head in shame;
My neighbor is to blame.
Never again, will I blind date;
Can’t always afford, the out of the way hotel room rate.
Spider Michaels
Spider Michaels 